Daft descriptions for golf gear

I'm developing a bit of an irritation. It's to do with the way the marketing gonks at the club manufacturers describe their products. I'm a marketing man myself, so I'm not scared of purple prose or descriptions that are intended to excite the reader. Not at all.

What irritates me is when the description of the club (or ball, or other bit of kit) is completely meaningless. I'll give you an example: Ping drivers. They do several, and they are characterised across a number of parameters, one of which is 'forgiveness'. Now, I realise you can't easily have 'low', 'medium' and 'high' - nobody will go for a driver with 'low' forgiveness, but 'high', 'maximum' and 'extreme'? What exactly do they mean, and is it in any way meaningful?

I think, though, that my favourite so far is the Titleist brochure. Now, it might be useful to know what sort of player each iron set is aimed at, so they need a way of describing the player. Fair enough, they aren't going to go 'rubbish' 'quite good' 'wanna be pro', are they?

What, pray, does 'avid', 'serious' and 'skilled' tell me, though?


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